It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
