My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
