if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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