you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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