girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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