Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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