Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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