I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
i think we sleep fucked last night...
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
