I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
