it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
tell me about the eggs
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
