hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
