he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
