Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
