You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
