I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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