HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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