I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
He passed out mid-signature
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
