Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
