talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
