I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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