Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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