she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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