you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I hate all girls vehemently.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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