Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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