What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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