i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
