everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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