i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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