There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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