So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
