I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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