is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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