You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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