you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
