Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
