When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
We don't watch enough power rangers
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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