So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
