I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
