yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
