I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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