Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
too bad you live with your parents still
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I have aggressive nipples.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
