where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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