after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
