I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
