if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
well you can't waste a boner
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
