No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I wear drunk well.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
