Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize