How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
