I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
