my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
