He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
